Heres one for u married guys!!! Wife !.0 just Released

[McNut]

Wife 1.0 Just Released

Dear Tech support,
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7,0 to Wife 1.0 and noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of new
space and valuable resoruces. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure. In addition, Wife 1.0 installs it self into all other programs and launches during system initization, where it monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Drunken Boys Night 2.5, and Suturday Football 5.0 no longer run, crashing the system when ever selected. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run some of my other favorite apps. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on this program.
Can you Help me Please!!!???
Thanks ,
A troubled user

Dear Troubled User,
This is a very common problem men complain about, but is mostly due to primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking it is merely a UTILITIES & ENTERTAINMENT program. Wife 1.0 is am OPERATING SYSTEM and designed by it's creator to run everything. It is unlikly you would be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still convert back to Girlfriend 7.0. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Girlfriend 7.0 to emulate Wife 1.0 so nothing would be gained. It is impossabe to uninstall, delete , or purge the program files from the system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is not desgined to do this.
Some have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or Wife 2.0 but end up with more problems than the origanal system. Look in your manuel under "Warnings-Alimony/Child support". I recomend yoou keep Wife 1.0 and deal with the situation.
I suggest installing background application program C:\YES_DEAR to alleviate software augmentation. Having installed Wife 1.0 myself, I might also suggest you read entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). You must assume all responsibility for faults and problems that occur, regardless of their cause.
The best corse of action will be to the command C:\APOLOGIZE. In any case avoid excessive use of C:\YES_DEAR because ultimately you may have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the operating system will return to normal. The System will run smoothly as long as you take the blame for all the GPFs.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but very high matenance. Consider buying additional software to improve the performance of Wife 1.0. I reccomend Flowers 3.1and Diamonds 2K. DO NOT under any circumstances install Secretery with Short Skirt 3.3. This is not a supported app for Wife 1.0 and is likely to cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best Of Luck,
Tech Support

SORRY FOR ERRORS

[Geddy]

If only this problem was know a few years back

[STALKER]

well after nearly 9 years runnin this os i think it must b corrupt as i can run snooker/beer 9.1 with no glitches
the os runs happily in the background even when i run football 4.4.2 flat back four version
do i need a patch to plug the hole in the os security
i think i'm lucky and got an early beta version and not the full home retail version



LONG LIVE WIFE 1.0(WELL MY COPY ANYWAY)

[McNut]

lol Stalker

[flash]

i stick with Girlfrind 7.0 me think
sounds like to much trouble if i upgrade

[SenecaWolf]

Hmm, in my opinion, best results have been noticed with the more current Wife 1.0 running on an older version of Husband, preferably with a few years between versions. Older Husband versions seem much more stable and less likely to crash then versions more closely released such as Husband 1.0 and Wife 1.0 which seem to cause many conflicts. I am currently a Wife 1.0 (released in 1975) but my Husband is a 0.9 (released in 1959). There doesn't seem to be as many bugs as more current husband versions such as Excuses & Alibis 1.2, Corrupt Memory files pertaining to important dates, and Drunken Boys Night isn't even an option in this version. Also this version has come already installed with Goals 1.5, Job 3.6, Flowers 3.0, Breakfast in Bed 2.1 and Diamonds 1K. The ever bothersome C:\YES_DEAR is still present and I don't think that this will ever be removed as it seems that it is a necessary file used to help deter major conflicts and as a fail safe to the Husband program. The C:\APOLOGIZE file is used exactly when needed without having to force the application to run. The only fault noticed with Husband 0.9 is the difficulty in releasing resources to Wife 1.0 for certain applications such as Mall 2.3 and Vacation 4.2. Although with much time and effort, Husband can be reconfigured to allow for such apps. Also, some older versions may have to face Mid-Life Crisis 1.0. Although this is not present in all installations it seems to be a hidden app that materializes in some cases. I have no data on this occurence because this is something that will have to be dealt with depending on system.

[McNut]

Oh NO!!!! Wife 1.0(SenecaWolf) has curupted Fun Forums!!! LOL

[Geddy]

Quick

Ctrl Alt Delete

[flash]

Help Ctrl Alt Delete has failed to work
does anyone know if cutting the power will work

[[AsC]Frags]

DO NOT UNPLUG THE FORUM SERVER IT MAY CAUSE MESSAGES NOT TO POST CORR............................. <click>

[SenecaWolf]

Have you all seen Ghost In The Machine? Same thing that Wife 1.0 does

[Angelicaca]

Nice one Seneca!!!!

[Sam]

i found that if u run 2 comps together wife 1.0 will stay on one machine most of the time but u have to be carefull as it still reads all program files and /be up to bed in a min dear has stopped working? anybody got any ideas what to install to make wife 1.0 think /bedtime is normal at 3.00am?

[GodsEvilTwin]

Hey Sam there is a program that a friend of mine wrote called /pleasure 1.2! It is a good program for Husband 1.0 and well its great! What it does is it give many many gifts to Wife 1.0 so she is very gullible to /suggestions! So you can have a fun time with Wife 1.0 and then get away with /bedtime at 3:00 but you can't do /bedtime 3:00am that often or she will overheat!

[Sam]

thx gods will try that but i got problem with the /u been in my wallet
virus at the mo so dont know if it will fix it
i heard the 1.6 version of gimmie money sucker can fix it but the program costs a load is there a freeware out there?
is the /flowers from grave yard program anygood or does it reboot ur system?

[SenecaWolf]

All of these comments just verifies the fact that I have the awesomest version of Husband.

[STALKER]

and i have the best version of wife 1.0 ..........i think

[Cosmos]

Girlfriend 7.0 will do nicely.

[stomith]

Has anyone got a copy of Version 1.0 as mine doesn't work anymore. I can return it after I have given it a go.

It stopped working when I installed Children 1.0 and 2.0 and I can't get it to work again. Knowing my luck it probably won't work again until somin like Children v16 is out. By then, I will have outdated hardware and won't be able to eject properly.

I downloaded DirectseX-9 from Microsoft but it still errors for no apparent reason. Typical!

[Angelicaca]

You should know better than that Stom, DirectSex-9 was banned !!! It had apparently sat on the shelf for too long.

[stomith]

they got no more in stock? damn.


I could try another store?

[Angelicaca]

Maybe you ought to buy the regular version instead of the cheap cut down DirectSex one.

Mine works just fine and i am not telling you where u get it from either!

[LaW]

you're all mad